"My toughest fight was with my first wife." - Muhammad Ali
Kodak is being demolished.  My parents had an instamatic I'll send them a picture!We found that your child does not interact well with mobile devicesLio has Show and Tell today at school!That's odd... the weather called for no cloudsMitt Romney tax problems is that he's mostly in stocksIs that shredded carrots on the front of your jacket?

If You Don't Laugh At These - You Might Just Be A Redneck!

A Redneck passed away and left his entire estate to his beloved widow  ... but she can't touch it 'till she's 14. How do you know when you're staying in a Redneck motel?  When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink."  And the clerk replies ... "Go ahead." Did you hear ... more

Obama And The Undertaker

Obama goes on a State visit to Israel.  While he is on a tour of Jerusalem, he has a fatal heart attack. The undertaker tells the US diplomats: "You can have him shipped home for $1 million or you can bury him here in the Holy Land for $100". The US diplomats go into a huddle and come back ... more
Obama Toilet Paper

On The Twelfth Day Of Christmas My True Love Gave To Me!

I know there's a joke here about sh*tty job but... (someone help me out!)
The Doctor and the Cheap Two Bit Tramp wedding invitation

The Wedding Invitation. The Wedding Photo.

What does he see in her?
Everyday I give my family two choices for dinner:  Take it or Leave it

Everyday I Give My Family Two Choices For Dinner

Every day I give my family two choices for dinner: Take it or Leave it

Mark Twain - Precious Things

"It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them." - Mark Twain

Splinters In Her Crotch

A woman from Los Angeles, CA who was a tree hugger, a Democrat, and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville, WA.  There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract.  She wanted a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started to climb the big ... more

A Note From A Police Officer In Texas

I get irritated when people come down on our police officers, saying that they don't care about others. Well, here is a story that clearly shows "not all cops are in that category". This story involves the police department in the small hill country town of Fredericksburg, TX. which reported ... more
Ukulele Kid from YouTube

Ukulele Kid

Name calling jealous birds

Goth... Gay...

Re using bottle tops to seal bags step 1

Re-Using Bottle Tops A Green Medal Winner!

Seal Plastic Bags with Old Bottle Caps. What a great idea, no more twist ties or rubber bands, instead use bottle tops to seal a bag! This methods is water proof and air tight. Cut ... more
Lio is so excited it's snowing that the only sound he makes is, Kloon!

A Nod Is As Good As A Wink To A Blind Man

Deer Hunting by Ted Nugent

Ted Nugent, rock star and avid bow hunter from Michigan, was being interviewed by a liberal journalist, and animal rights activist. The discussion came around to deer hunting. The journalist asked, "What do you think is the last ... more

Definition Of A Real Woman

A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he ... more

Amazing Simple Home Remedies

1. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop. 2. Men: Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. 3. For high blood ... more

New Senior Health Plan

You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians. Of ... more

A Father Reflected On How Sweet And Innocent His Little Girl Was…

A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and innocent his little girl was. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her and noticed she was looking ... more

Three Contractors Bidding On A Government Job

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Montana. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The ... more
Daddy how was I born?

Daddy, How Was I Born?

A little boy goes to his father and asks, "Daddy, how was I born ?" The father answers, "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mum and I first got ... more
For the Christmas Season remember - Alcohol does not make you fat, it makes you lean... against chairs, tables, walls, floors, and ugly people!

For The Christmas Season Remember!

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