"Every morning is the dawn of a new error." - Anonymous
- German grandmother gives birth to quadruplets at age 65
- Milwaukee man pronounced dead, then moves and breathes - authorities
- Could another English king be buried under a car park?
- Arizona woman gets 3.5 years prison for driving over non-voting husband
- After 72 years, Oklahoma veteran to receive high school diploma
- German police find lamb in a Munich brothel, and rescue it
- Bowwow wow! Dog domestication much older than previously known
- 'Top 10' new species includes cartwheeling spider, 'chicken from hell'
- To heel or not to heel, that is the Cannes question
- Deceased councilwoman in Pittsburgh wins Democratic primary
Grandpa Was Wearing Only A Shirt!
A man came to visit his grandparents, and he noticed his grandfather sitting on the porch in the rocking chair wearing only a shirt, with nothing on from the waist down. 'Grandpa, what are you doing? Your weenie is out in the wind for everyone to see!' he exclaimed. The old man looked off ... more
On The Twelfth Day Of Christmas My True Love Gave To Me!
I know there's a joke here about sh*tty job but... (someone help me out!)
The New Hearing Aid
An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your ... more
What Andy Rooney Didn't Say About Older Women
In praise of older women. As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the ... more
Phone ringing... "Hello?" "Hi Honey, this is Daddy, is Mommy near the phone?" "No Daddy, she's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Gabe." After a brief pause ... Daddy replies, "But Honey, you haven't got an Uncle Gabe." "Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy right ... more
Deer Hunting by Ted Nugent
Ted Nugent, rock star and avid bow hunter from Michigan, was being interviewed by a liberal journalist, and animal rights activist. The discussion came around to deer hunting. The journalist asked, "What do you think is the last ... more
Definition Of A Real Woman
A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he ... more
Amazing Simple Home Remedies
1. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop. 2. Men: Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. 3. For high blood ... more
New Senior Health Plan
You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians. Of ... more
A Father Reflected On How Sweet And Innocent His Little Girl Was…
A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and innocent his little girl was. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her and noticed she was looking ... more
Three Contractors Bidding On A Government Job
Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Montana. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The ... more
Daddy, How Was I Born?
A little boy goes to his father and asks, "Daddy, how was I born ?" The father answers, "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mum and I first got ... more