"Aspire to inspire before you expire." - Anonymous
- Australian artist emerges alive from three-day burial under road
- Australian supermarket giant says 'yes' to mass nude photograph
- Russia cries foul over Nigerian fans' World Cup chicken requests
- Research on dogs might shed light on human responses to food: study
- Russia's psychic cat Achilles picks home team for World Cup opener
- Minnesota online sensation raccoon captured atop skyscraper
- Belgian zoo welcomes baby giraffe Twiga
- Chinese vase found in shoebox sells for $19 million
- Penka the Bulgarian cow escapes death sentence after international outcry
- Astronauts give pope personalized space suit, add white cape
A Little Las Vegas Church Trivia
Las Vegas Churches accept gambling chips! This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas, but there are more Catholic churches than casinos. Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday Services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed. Since ... more
Getting Old - Senior Citizen Says ...
A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: "So I hear you're getting married?" "Yep!" "Do I know her?" "Nope!" "This woman, is she good looking?" "Not really." "Is she a good cook?" "Naw, she can't cook too well." "Does she have lots of money?" "Nope! Poor as ... more
You Never Listen To Me When You're Cooking!
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we ... more
Mark Twain - Never Put Off
"Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow." - Mark Twain
My Wife and I
"My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine." - Anonymous
Little Johnny Said...
A teacher asked her 6th grade class how many of them were Obama fans. Not really knowing what an Obama fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny. The teacher asked Little Johnny why he decided to again be different. Little Johnny ... more
Archaeologists Discover Remains Of First Politician
An Archaeological team discovered what they believe to be the bones and fossil remains of the first politician.
Deer Hunting by Ted Nugent
Ted Nugent, rock star and avid bow hunter from Michigan, was being interviewed by a liberal journalist, and animal rights activist. The discussion came around to deer hunting. The journalist asked, "What do you think is the last ... more
Definition Of A Real Woman
A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he ... more
Amazing Simple Home Remedies
1. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop. 2. Men: Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. 3. For high blood ... more
New Senior Health Plan
You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians. Of ... more
A Father Reflected On How Sweet And Innocent His Little Girl Was…
A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and innocent his little girl was. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her and noticed she was looking ... more
Three Contractors Bidding On A Government Job
Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Montana. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The ... more
Daddy, How Was I Born?
A little boy goes to his father and asks, "Daddy, how was I born ?" The father answers, "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mum and I first got ... more