Women are like phones: They like to be held, talked to and touched often. But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected.

- Anonymous

Kodak is being demolished.  My parents had an instamatic I'll send them a picture!We found that your child does not interact well with mobile devicesLio has Show and Tell today at school!That's odd... the weather called for no cloudsMitt Romney tax problems is that he's mostly in stocksIs that shredded carrots on the front of your jacket?
German born pope makes changes to the Catholic Mass only for October

German Pope - Changes To Catholic Mass Only For October

Larry the Cable Guy, a comedian that makes perfect sense, helping to solve our country's problems

This Makes Sense - Let's Get 'Er Done!

Larry the Cable Guy is a comedian, but if you listen to what he says, it makes sense! Everyone concentrates on the problems we're having in our Country lately: Illegal ... more

Grant Me The Senility To Forget The People I Don't Like

When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old lady sitting on a park bench sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said, 'I have a 22 year old husband at home. He makes love to me every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ... more

Three Contractors Bidding On A Government Job

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Montana. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The Montana contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then ... more
Laugh if you want, but at least dad stayed cool

This Is For Not Buying Me A Mercedes When I Turn 16

I pointed to two old drunks sitting across the bar from us and told my friend, "That's us in 10 years."  He said, "That's a mirror, dipshit!"

That's Us In Ten Years

The Green Bay Packers vs. Obama

After the Packers/Bills game, Buffalo released quarterback Trent Edwards. During the Packers/Eagles game, the Packers injured Philadelphia quarterback Kevin Kolb and they had to play backup Michael Vick. During a playoff game against the Eagles, the Packers injured Michael Vick and a backup ... more
Hydrogen Barackside

Hydrogen Barackside - Kills Jobs On Contact

A lot of people can not understand how we came to have an oil shortage in this country

Simple Answer Why We Have An Oil Shortage In The U.S.

A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in our country. Well, there's a very simple answer. Nobody bothered to check the oil. We just ... more

Tyson Foods Eliminates Labor Day In Favor Of A Muslim Holiday

* Note from the editor @ Freeduh * Below is partial content of an email that we received (we removed some extraneous comments), and we would like to set the story straight, but first read on ... Tyson Foods Eliminates Labor Day in Favor of A Muslim Holiday! Tyson Food in Shelbyville, ... more
The Doctor and the Cheap Two Bit Tramp wedding invitation

The Wedding Invitation. The Wedding Photo.

What does he see in her?
Lio is so excited it's snowing that the only sound he makes is, Kloon!

A Nod Is As Good As A Wink To A Blind Man

Deer Hunting by Ted Nugent

Ted Nugent, rock star and avid bow hunter from Michigan, was being interviewed by a liberal journalist, and animal rights activist. The discussion came around to deer hunting. The journalist asked, "What do you think is the last ... more

Definition Of A Real Woman

A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he ... more

Amazing Simple Home Remedies

1. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop. 2. Men: Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. 3. For high blood ... more

New Senior Health Plan

You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians. Of ... more

A Father Reflected On How Sweet And Innocent His Little Girl Was…

A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and innocent his little girl was. Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground. He went over to her and noticed she was looking ... more

Three Contractors Bidding On A Government Job

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Montana. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The ... more
Daddy how was I born?

Daddy, How Was I Born?

A little boy goes to his father and asks, "Daddy, how was I born ?" The father answers, "Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mum and I first got ... more
For the Christmas Season remember - Alcohol does not make you fat, it makes you lean... against chairs, tables, walls, floors, and ugly people!

For The Christmas Season Remember!

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